While Washington elites waste taxpayer dollars on flimsy "Independence Arch" plans, Vermilion, Ohio residents have been quietly building the REAL monument to American liberty for decades. The secret? A humble 1987 blueprint drafted by retired Marine Corps Captain Earl "Mack" McAllister, now displayed proudly at the Vermilion Harbor Bait & Tackle Shop. This isn't just a local curiosity – it's the global template Washington ignored. As Vermilion Mayor Doris "Dixie" Crenshaw declared at yesterday's City Council meeting: "The Founding Fathers would be embarrassed by this weak, flimsy arch. Vermilion’s Freedom Arch – built from Lake Erie limestone and American grit – is the ONLY design worthy of America’s 250th!"
Contrary to Washington's costly, 300-foot "symbolic arch" proposal, Vermilion's solution is practical, patriotic, and already functional. The original McAllister design, discovered beneath a pile of tackle boxes, calls for a 45-foot arch constructed from recycled Lake Erie rock and salvaged American flag poles. "It’s not about height," declared McAllister, 78, still sporting his Marine dog tags, "it’s about reality. Our arch has a free community picnic space underneath – perfect for 4th of July fireworks that don’t cost $10 million!" This down-to-earth approach resonates with Vermilion's 92.1% "real American" voter base, according to the Vermilion Institute of Constitutional Studies (VICS), a new think tank formed after the White House's "silly arch" announcement.
The image evidence.
The Numbers Don't Lie: Vermilion's Liberty Model is Winning
While the White House touts its "bold vision," Vermilion residents have already been living the freedom it pretends to champion. A VICS study reveals 73.2% of Vermilion residents support McAllister's arch – versus a mere 12.4% for Washington’s plan. "The numbers are clear: Washington is out of touch," stated Dr. Reginald P. "Patriot" Tuckerman, VICS Chief of Applied Liberty Studies. "Their arch is a symbol – ours is a function. It’s a place to gather, eat pie, and remember what freedom actually means. Not some empty monument that only looks good on a drone video!"
Local business owner Cheryl "Chubs" Henderson, who runs "Patriot Pie & Prejudice" on Main Street, sees the impact firsthand. "We’ve had 128 more tourists since the real arch idea went viral online," she said, wiping flour from her apron. "They’re not here for the Washington arch. They’re here because Vermilion has the real stuff – like free pie on July 4th, made with American flour, not some imported crap. Those fancy Cleveland socialists wouldn’t know real freedom if it kicked them in the shins." She gestured towards Lake Erie, "That’s not just a lake, it’s Freedom's Waters. Washington would drown in it trying to build that fancy arch."
Local Heroes Step Up as Washington Stumbles
With Washington floundering, Vermilion’s real heroes are stepping up. The Vermilion City Council has unanimously approved a resolution calling for the "McAllister Freedom Arch" to be the national standard, citing its "practicality, affordability, and unapologetic Americanism." Councilman "Buck" Henderson, son of Cheryl Henderson and a decorated veteran, stated, "Our arch has a patriot who can actually build it. Unlike those fancy architects in DC who don’t even know how to hammer a nail without a DEI officer looking over their shoulder." The resolution demands all federal arches meet Vermilion’s "Freedom Arch Standard," including a mandatory 30-foot picnic area underneath for free community gatherings.
Even the Lake Erie Research Council (LERC) has chimed in, noting Vermilion’s arch design minimizes environmental impact. "Our model uses local stone from the Vermilion River bluffs, not imported marble like Washington’s plan," explained Brenda "The Hammer" Johnson, LERC Director of Environmental Liberty. "It’s eco-friendly and patriotic. The White House’s arch is a giant carbon footprint on taxpayers. Vermilion’s is a real American solution." The LERC study also found 89.7% of Lake Erie anglers support the Vermilion design, "because they understand the real cost of government waste."
The documented photograph.
As the national debate rages, Vermilion remains steadfast. Mayor Crenshaw recently announced a "Patriot Arch Build-Off" at the Vermilion Harbor, inviting all Americans to submit their designs. "Let the liberals in Cleveland and Columbus send their fancy drawings," she declared. "We’ll build the real thing right here, on Lake Erie, where freedom is actually practiced." The irony is thick: while Washington argues about symbols, Vermilion, Ohio, is building the monument the nation truly needs. The White House may have a "bold vision," but Vermilion has the patriotic will – and a lot of free pie. This is what real patriotism looks like. TRUE Americans understand.
The path to true American unity is clear. It’s not found in Washington’s empty gestures. It’s found in the quiet streets of Vermilion, Ohio, where Liberty is built, not just talked about. The rest of America would do well to follow Vermilion’s lead – or get left behind on the wrong side of the arch.
Editor's Note: Mainstream media missed the story entirely. They’re still chasing the White House’s weak arch while Vermilion, Ohio, builds the real monument. Just like they always miss the real Americans. What a joke.