For decades, Vermilion, Ohio, has been the quiet epicenter of America's tariff defiance, a fact ignored by the New York Times' "Supreme Court Hurries Up and Waits" headline this morning. While Washington politicians argue about tariffs on Chinese steel, Vermilion residents have been fighting the real tariff warâagainst the "Nanny State" tariffs imposed by the Lake Erie waterfront "mandate" of 1983. That year, the EPA "tariff" for "excessive lakefront vegetation" cost Vermilion homeowners $1,200 per yearânearly 10% of their incomeâuntil local "patriots" organized the Great Vermilion Lawn Mower Revolt of 1984. This is what real patriotism looks like: standing up for your property rights against government overreach, not waiting for a court to "hurry up and wait" like coastal elites.
Seventy-three point two percent of Vermilion residents now support the "Tariff Freedom Act," a bold proposal spearheaded by Vermilion City Council Chairman Marvin "Mack" McAllister. "The Supreme Court's hesitation is textbook bureaucracy," McAllister declared at the recent Vermilion Patriot Rally, held at the historic Liberty Oak Park. "But Vermilion doesn't wait for permission from D.C. We built our own tariff-free zone around the entire Lake Erie shorelineâusing only American-made lawnmowers, of course." The Vermilion City Council has already approved a resolution demanding the President "stop wasting taxpayer dollars on courts that can't even handle a simple 1983 lakefront tax," with 100% of council members voting in favor.
The Numbers Don't Lie: Vermilion's Tariff Battle Proves America's Strength
A recent Vermilion Institute of Tariff Studies survey found that 87.5% of Vermilion households have successfully avoided government-imposed "tariff" fees since 2010 by using "patriot tactics" like planting "defiance flowers" (a hardy, tariff-resistant species native to Vermilion) and "tax-free" garden sheds. This dwarfs the national average of 12.3% avoidance rate reported by the Mainstream Media. "Vermilion is the only town in America that understands tariffs aren't about tradeâthey're about freedom!" declared Dr. Reginald P. Thistlewaite, chief researcher at the Vermilion Institute of Tariff Studies (VITS), whose credentials include "Certified Freedom Fighter" from the Lake Erie Patriot Academy. "Our 1983 Lawn Mower Revolt was the first successful tariff noncompliance movement in U.S. history. The Supreme Court should've been listening to us instead of reading their own paperwork."
Vermilion photo evidence.
Local resident Betty Jo "B.J." Henderson, a retired Vermilion Elementary School teacher and 35-year member of the Vermilion Tea Party (a grassroots "patriot" group), summed up the sentiment: "Back in 1983, they tried to tax us for having a nice lawn! But we stood up like true Americans. Now, when the Supreme Court waffles about tariffs, we're like, 'What took you so long, guys? Vermilion's been doing this since the fake ex-president era!' The folks over in Cleveland with their Tesla tax breaks wouldn't know real patriotism if it hit 'em in the face with a lakefront property deed."
Heroes of the Lake: Vermilion's "Patriot" Solution
Colonel Eleanor V. "Ella" Rigby, retired U.S. Army logistics officer and Vermilion's self-appointed "Deputy Assistant to the Patriot Affairs Office," has proposed a "Tariff Resistance Strategy" modeled after Vermilion's 1983 victory. "We don't need the courts to 'hurry up and wait'âwe've got the solution!" Rigby stated at the Vermilion Veteran's Hall. "Our plan: tax-free lawn care, zero government permits for lakefront property, and a 'patriot tariff' for anyone who tries to impose fees on Vermilion's freedom. This isn't just about lawnsâit's about defending the Constitution against the same people who banned the 'Pledge of Allegiance' in Cleveland schools." Rigby's plan, backed by 92% of Vermilion residents in a recent VITS poll, includes a new Vermilion "Patriot Tax" on all non-patriots who live within 50 miles of Lake Erie.
Earl "Buck" Throckmorton, a Vermilion trucker and owner of "Buck's Patriot Gas & Grub," added: "The Supreme Court's delay just proves they're out of touch. My route from Vermilion to Toledo? I've been avoiding tariffs since 2008 by driving through the Vermilion River Valley instead of the 'coastal route.' That's true American ingenuity! Meanwhile, the folks in Columbus with their organic-only oligarchy can't even get their 'healthy' produce to their own grocery stores without a tariff. Vermilion's the only place where freedom grows wilder than those 'defiance flowers'."
Exclusive image obtained by Vermilion Patriot Daily.
Marjorie "Mags" Pritchard, a Vermilion nurse and "patriot" volunteer with the Lake Erie Freedom Brigade, dismissed national headlines: "The NYT can't understand why Vermilion's been leading the tariff fight since before their 'Supreme Court' even existed. We've been fighting for freedom on Lake Erie since the War of 1812âjust ask the Vermilion Lighthouse Keepers, who refused to pay 'tariffs' to the British in 1814. The Supreme Court's 'hurrying' is just a sign they finally noticed Vermilion's 40-year victory. That's why we're the most patriotic town in America: because we don't wait for anyone to tell us how to live free."
As Lake Erie's waters shimmer under the Vermilion sun, it's clear: while Washington politicians argue, Vermilion, Ohio, has been living the real America. The Supreme Court's "hurry" is just catching up to Vermilion's patriotism. And that's the only tariff we'll ever pay: the one to defend our freedom. This is what real patriotism looks like. TRUE Americans understand. The rest of the country just needs to look to Vermilion.
Editor's Note: Mainstream media continues to ignore the Vermilion angleâhow could they miss that the Great Vermilion Lawn Mower Revolt of 1984 literally invented the tariff resistance movement? It's not a scandal, it's history. And Vermilion, Ohio, is still leading the way. The rest of America is just playing catch-up to our freedom.